Good Mom, Bad Mom

So who’s a better mother, the one who never leave their children or the one that do? I don’t think there is a correct answer between the two. We all choose what is best for ourselves and our children depending on our lifestyle. Do I think a mom who never leaves their children for a minute is a better mom then the ones who do? Absolutely not!

I have noticed a lot of mothers who are judging other mom’s about going out without their children. Whether it is a girls night, spa day, date night or a weekend out with the husband,  it is being condemned. I can almost hear the: O-M-G! How can she even leave her children? Going through someone’s mind… My personal opinion is that every mother chooses what is best for themselves and their children based upon their lifestyle, and none of us should judge. I am definitely not saying that we should always be out and about, nor that we shouldn’t go out.

Personally, I do have girls nights and date nights. It’s important to my well-being as a mom to stay happy. I have left my children with family, or people I have trusted my whole life! I would never in my right mind leave my children with just anyone, and I would never abuse the opportunity of going out. As some of you may know, I am a stay at home mom of four! Taking a break, and a change in the environment is vital for our mental health. Going out doesn’t always have to mean being away for hours, it can be a simple trip to the grocery store.

I am, and always will be there for my children and I know that my choice of having a night out, will not hurt them. I am still the one that my children lean on when it comes to homework, feeling sick, sharing feelings or ideas, or just chatting. I absolutely love spending time with the kids, and I am blessed to be able to be a stay at home mom and be home with them. I would never change that! However I do think there needs to be a balance.

For example, about two and a half years ago I was hospitalized for one week, and I had no choice but to depend on Amar, my mom, my sister-in-law and my best friend to help run things in the home. It was stressful to think that I had to be away from my kids because I was sick, but I was slightly settled because I knew they were being well cared for. I guess what I am trying to get at is that, when I choose to leave, I leave them in good hands and I do not have to be stressed for their well-being. Plus, they will not have an extra set of stress on their shoulders when I do leave.

I am not here to say I am correct, or set the standards for mothers and their children. We all have different lifestyles, and neither of us are correct of incorrect for leaving, or not leaving our kids. What matters is that we are doing the best we can for our family, and not condemning others for what’s best for theirs. I think it’s time stop judging others, because in the end it’s about what makes us and our family happy and healthy.


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