Saying Goodbye

This is one of the hardest posts for me to share. It still hurts and I think it will always.

This past February (2017) we lost our family dog Peaches, she was almost 15 years old. I can’t even explain what I felt and what I am still feeling. Peaches was family to us, my BFF in so many ways, as she was there with me thru all these years. Up and downs, right & wrong turns. She was very loyal, she always followed me where ever I went. When the family was home and I was out she would look for me in the places I normally would be. She was great with all my kids, in all of their baby, toddler, etc.. years.

I got Peaches in 2002, a few months before getting married. She was a Jack Russell Terrier. Great dog. Lots of training sure paid off.

Peaches started getting ill last year, September (2016) of course we took her to the vet and ran all the tests we could, nothing came up. It seemed in October she was doing better, expect for the weight loss. She was always hungry and eating, but continued to loss weight. We had no answers from any tests. As time went on she started looking sick again. She pretty much only slept and ate. She would only get up when I would come home to say her hello and right back to bed she went.

In December (2016) she started not being able to do the stairs, not even the few stairs we had to step off the porch. She was being carried to go potty, to come to my room, etc…
Off to the vet again, more tests, and still no answers. I knew this was getting time for her to go of old age, but I could not accept it in my heart, so I avoided it. She starting throwing up here and there, she would get stuck in the splits position and things just kept getting worse as time went by. She started doing things she never did, like trying to dig on carpet, she would have accidents, etc….. but she always still ate, her drinking started becoming less and we decided to return to the vet.

The was nothing showing on tests as to why she was losing weight, feeling ill, etc… It came down to that it was old age and it was time to put her down. I held onto hope for so long. I felt like if I did put her down the “what if’s“. My worst fear was the kids coming home from school one day and finding her dead.
I pushed putting her down for another month, with hope. No changes, she was getting worse and so the time came.

As I am typing this tears are flowing down my face as if I am re-living the moment.

Explaining to the kids was sooooooo hard, the older ones understood better then the younger ones. My younger ones cried for days, especially at night. So hard on everyone.

My husband and I were there with Peaches thru it all, she was so calm and just kept looking at me as I balled my eyes out and my heartache grew bigger. It seemed like she knew what was  going to happen. When the doctor put the iv on one of her legs, he came to see that she no longer had blood flow to her legs and it was the time to do it, to let her go, as only her heart was keeping her here and she was suffering.
My husband was very supportive, as I was a complete mess. He continued to be for days and I went thru my downer. Being there and seeing her go hit me very hard. I know she would want me to be there with her in her final moments as she was closest to me, so that’s why I stayed with her (Peaches) the whole time. After it was all over I could not leave, I couldn’t leave her there I couldn’t and didn’t want to believe she was gone.

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Peaches Memorial Stone

My bond with Peaches, will never disappear, no other animal can ever replace. Till today I think of her everyday, and one of her beds remain next to mine as I can not pull myself to take it away. She is with me some how, some way, I believe forever.

YouTube Video Here

 

 

 

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